Vikas's Tid Bits

Family Values?

I always wonder about the deteoriating condition of the family values in India. Indian family values always stress on the few things like joint family (parents stay with their child's family), everyone works toward a common goal of making family's position stronger in society from both monetary and non-monetary aspect. Children take care of their parents in their old age. Old parents provide guidance and inculcate the human values to the family. Due to the western culture influence and changing work & life environment in urban areas, there is a great wave which is forcing families to be nuclear family which redefines the word family to be Husband, Wife & non-working kids. Indian Parents spends their whole life in growing up their kids (be it joint family or nuclear family) and providing a better environment to enable them to be a good & reputed citizen. They spend all their income in the child's education and for them, children are their true investments. They sacrifice their personal life to make the life of children safe. By the time children grows up and start earning, parents already reach the retirement age which means that they will not have any source of income and no time to enjoy their life. At this stage they expect their children to take care of them. They get their kids married with lot of hope and expectations. But the children, instead of caring their parents, start thinking about their own life and their own family. They feel uncomfortable to stay with their parents as they think this interferes with their privacy. For them, family means their spouse and kids. They start feeling ashamed of their parents if they don't have any source of income. Their spouse will have lot of differences with them and they hate their in-laws as they think they are interruption to their independence and family life. They don't think their parents as asset, they think them as burden. They prefer to stay away from parents and treat them as guests. They dump them in their old house or in their village and don't turn back to them at all.
I wonder if this is the expectation which the parents had from their kids. Why do they give birth to kid? Why do they spend their hard earned money completely on their kids to make their life and career if the kids treat them as burden and feel ashamed to live with them? Who will take care of them in their tough times? Do their kids forget that the same situation will happen to them tomorrow when they become old and their kids grow up? Why are we in this kind of pitiful situation? What is the sin or fault of parents? Is it that they have grown older and can't earn any money? But this is the same thing which will happen to kids also tomorrow. They will also grow old and stop earning. Why the society has become so selfish?

posted by Vikas Mishra @ 6:24 am